Stop looking for a job already!!!
She wakes every morning before the crack of dawn, to ensure his lunch kit is filled, homework checked and uniform ready.
Even before the sun rises, she kisses him good bye while still asleep and prays to God that he stays safe and gets to school on time and unharmed.
In her village most girls are pregnant by the time they turn 16 and are pregnant with baby number 2 by 18, so she has done well by the village standards.
Yes, she messed up. She got pregnant for a dead beat guy but she graduated from school and made something of herself. It's been ten years since and she hasn't so much as gone on a date. She has managed to keep a job all this time as well. She's working her way up.
She wants a better life for her child, but isn't quite certain how to get it. All she's ever been taught is to work hard and stay employed where it's safe and secure. That means leaving home at 4 am to get to work on time and not reaching back home until after 7 pm.
She misses his every game, she misses every PTA meeting, but she is determined not to let him down. She is determined to set a good example of hard work and discipline.
He is a good boy; he gets up on time, has his breakfast and gets to school without anyone there to monitor him. He never strays on his way home and gets his homework done.
She always leaves dinner on the stove before heading to work so he has dinner before bedtime. He has trained himself not to fall too deep into sleep until he feels her kiss good night. She is safe at home. Now he can rest.
This account is sadly not the norm for many women that grow up in at risk communities. As hard as this story sounds, this would be considered a good one. This would result in the one boy that makes it out and goes on to do great things in spite of his beginnings, but we all know how the average story will end.
There are enough studies and evidence to show that the lack of supervision will lead the average child to delinquent behaviour - high levels of absenteeism, poor grades, school dropout and possibly entrance to a gang in search of a male role model.
I recently came across a website for battered women and the first thing that jumped out at me was the job placement feature of the home. I shook my head. Helping at risk women find jobs is at clear sign that we fail to understand the root cause of the so called delinquent behaviour we are experiencing in our schools.
This very noble gesture unfortunately contributes to the cycle. Mothers are forced to leave their children for most of the day just to earn an income. An income that most times cannot allow them to substitute their presence with top notch caregivers and after school activities.
It is my belief that women in at risk communities be taught more trade and business. Teach them to sew, cater and tap into their creativity. Show them how to develop a solid business plan and help them turn ideas into thriving businesses. Help mothers work from home, so that they can be more involved in raising their children.
It's time to change the conversation. It's time to make entrepreneurship more natural.
Have you ever visited those Artesian Markets? Soaps, jewelry, candles just to start. The best breads in town, jams and jellies, sweets and treats. All items that can be exported, sold in large retail chains or even online.
I recently visited one and what jumped out at me were the number of new vendors that have turned to this simply because they cannot get a job. While speaking to them I silently rejoice, because little do they know that their success story has already begun. What may seem to them as adversity is surely a break through on the horizon. I pray they stick to it.
Artesian Markets have given these women an outlet to sell once a week and in return they have created a business. Imagine if someone created shared administration services, delivery, marketing and financing? Just imagine if girls were socialized to believe that they could supply large chains with items made at home?
One wonders why the government hasn’t put more infrastructure in place to encourage this type of business. Surely it will benefit not only mothers and help build a stronger family unit, it stands to encourage arts and culture and help in our diversification efforts.
I will try not to make this a political post, so I will end with words of encouragement.
At the end of the month we will launch CARE Parenting - The Magazine and it will feature the first of our moms that are "Making it Work."
Every month we will tell a story of mothers working from home. We will get to see how many options and how many success stories there are and hopefully we will be inspired to dream past what we've been taught to accept as the norm. We will see just how possible it is to earn an income doing things we love, from home, flexibly around those we love.
Disclaimer - This article was originally written and published under the CARE umbrella - Guardian Media Limited
